Some of my random thoughts on life I post on my Instagram…

[Lilac]

Good idea bringing these over to the forum. Because, in my experience, Instagram is the most un-user-friendly platform if you don’t have an account.

Thanks!

[Cari]

@Zack Vegas

That video above puts another layer down for me to ponder. Somehow while I was listening to it it reminded me of my early childhood mind. I remember going through a long period in elementary school thinking that only what is is in front me, what I was seeing, was real and everything behind me was nothing, like a blank gray page. I would think I could get a glimpse of that nothing if I could look back fast enough. I think children have a more open mind and perceive things better. I still look at life like that in a way seeing the past and future as lifeless pages. Right now is all I think about. It is freeing.

[Cari]

“The proof is in the pudding” and “seeing is believing” is how I navigate the muddy waters of life nowadays. With age sometimes comes wisdom and inspiration and other times
warnings of what not to do. I can look back on my life and know where I went wrong here and there, and I could have stayed stuck in those places, but I continually kept climbing my mountain for better. You can never really know where you are at when there is turmoil from risky terrain all around you, but as I have gotten higher I can look back now and see an overall better view of my life. I can’t say I would change anything because my road has gotten me to this very good place, but if I had stayed content on my aging path from immediate gratification and resolve I can’t imagine how many people I would currently be leaning on for so many things. Instead I feel
energized and empowered at sixty-one years old, relying only on myself for every single thing. I wasn’t always this sure of myself, but seeing my
peers and elders decline has made me more determined not to go down that path. It is funny how we can see where other people are going wrong, but never ourselves. Even if they know what they should do they just don’t for all their reasons. Where I am at has been far from easy, but worth every struggle, sacrifice and tear. My father was someone to be admired for his wisdom, health, his charisma and his zest for life and watching him throw it all away because of his poor food choices was the best example of a precautionary tale I could ever have gotten. People would think it was a normal progression for him blaming his recent death on just getting old, but I saw the difference when he lived with me eating what I fed him and when he ate the standard American diet. My mother’s ending was even worse from her lifelong addiction to pain killers. I am determined to not let my ending be like theirs. I invest in myself everyday with my food choices, with my habits, with the people I allow in my life and by sticking to my bedtime and it is paying off in ways I could never have imagined. It all matters.
Happy everything!

[Author]

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